February 1, 2010
“Macmillan has a monopoly on its own titles.”Really, Amazon? Really? This is like saying I have a monopoly on my fingernails. Sorry dudes. I produce them, therefore they are mine. No one else is going to produce my fingernails. If I want to sell you my fingernails, it’s not because I’m taking advantage of you through my evil, twirly-mustachio’d monopoly, it is because I AM THE ONLY THING THAT PRODUCES THEM. Much like, say, the books that Macmillan chooses to publish. (Only, I don’t actually produce Macmillan books from my fingertips. Except, wait. Huh. I kind of do. Ha. (This analogy is getting out of hand. Ha ha.)) Is my logic weird here? I don’t know, I’m tired and grouchy. But it seems like accusing a publishing company of having a monopoly just because they want to price e-books the way they want to price them has a tinge of whiny-jerk to it. Just because you sell a whole bunch of fingernails doesn’t mean you get to dictate to me how much I can sell mine for. So there. PS. Macmillan books are WAY more interesting and fun to read than fingernails, by the way. Particularly the Macmillan book being released next fall about middle school zombies. I wrote that one with the chewed remains of my own fingernails. Just so we’re clear.